Writes Like a Bic
Upon reading Kevin's post, I thought I'd share a heart-warming boss's Christmas present tale with all of you.
My company is a bit larger than Kevin's—about 60 employees here in the "executive" offices (DUMP). For Christmas, we all pitch in $5 for the boss's Christmas gift. Rumor has it, that if you choose not to participate, then you don't get to sign the card. And if you don't sign the card, you might as well start thinking about saving a place for yourself in the unemployment line.
Anyway, I gave my $5, signed the card, and went on my merry way thinking that we'd get some kind of input about what the gift would be. A nice donation in his name to the Rescue Mission would be nice. Think about how many Christmas dinners this money could provide for some less fortunate valley residents. What a nice thought.
Earlier this week, I found out that the boss's wife already bought the Christmas gift for him. (you know, the gift that is from US?). Are you ready for this? (I really don't think you are, so I'll tell you right now that you better sit down.)
A $600 INK PEN! A $600 INK PEN! A $600 INK PEN! A $600 INK PEN!
Yeah, that's right. This guy is a multi-millionaire. These people are so out of touch. Did his wife actually think we'd all be thrilled about this? Do you know how many bills I could pay with $600? I could actually buy my family nice Christmas gifts. What a major ASSHOLE! Now, as you know, I don't swear very much. It really takes something HUGE to make me do it. When I found out about this gift, I was MAD. Actually, I was so angry about the injustice of it all, I wanted to cry. I did cry! Where is the compassion? Where is the sense of sharing your good fortune with your neighbors for whom $600 could mean the difference between a modest Christmas dinner and peanut butter sandwiches? The same neighbors that you employ in the summertime to work in your 120 degree warehouse for $5.25 an hour just to let go when you're done with them?
I want my $5 back. I want to scratch my name off the card. I want to scream at him at the top of my lungs a long string of swear words.
To top it all off, his secretary told me that she wrote with it, and in her words…
"Writes like a Bic."
posted by kimw @ 8:57 AM
4 Comments:
Aww man, I would be mad too. That is insanity. I don't even want to think of what I could do with $600. I really liked your idea about the Rescue Mission donation, that would've been a very nice thing to do. But a $600 pen? I've never even heard of such a thing, such a ridiculous thing. A string of swear words is definitely the appropriate response to this situation.
I am in complete shock! That is insane!! I second Kimmy, any words that you can think of would be appropriate!
Ya know Kim, I used to think my place of employment could be ridiculous, but yours, hands down, is from another planet.
That is ridic . ULOUS !!!!! I feel the real innards coming out , and your heart is beating in harmony with the master . For a pen . What else can ya say ?
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